By: Dean Fraser
Happiness is easier than it sounds.
We all want to have those good times and buy out the bad ones, yes? Yet it’s a fact of life that challenging situations or even people who shred our nerves, will inevitably be encountered on our journey through life.
Here we are presented with a choice. To give up on our personal power by pointlessly ranting about how unfair life is and continue validating ourselves to those who aren’t even interested in seeing our point of view OR choosing the more philosophical point of view and seeking to discover what this situation might have to teach us.
Things won’t always go the way we anticipated, it happens, what we need is a way to keep ourselves cool and centered, lending us to be flexible in our responses to quickly get things back on track.
Happiness combined with a more optimistic outlook is possible for any one of us to achieve as a conscious decision to take.
No matter what needs to be dealt with we will be able to cope with it in a positive way. Eventually getting to the point of viewing problems as challenges which are there to be easily overcome, rather than seeing them as random situations to lose sleep and worry over.
LOOK IN THE MIRROR
Find a mirror and look yourself direct in the eyes. Frown and look unhappy.
Next smile at yourself…see how much better you look!
How about making this the start of a new approach to life? I promise you’re going to find this one outrageously good fun!
Each morning while you are looking in the mirror preparing for the day ahead, whatever your routine is, brushing your hair or whatever – look yourself directly in the eyes and smile at you. Keep up the smiling for at least a minute and wish yourself a happy day.
When you first wake up in the morning, when you first open your eyes…smile. You have nothing at all to lose by giving this a go and you might well gain a lot!
During everyday life we can all experience situations where we start to feel stressed or a little overwhelmed, we need take a few moments out and go to the washroom. In privacy smile and keep it up for at least a minute, tell yourself out loud or in your mind that you are happy and will easily cope.
If your job involves talking to people on the phone and you are having one of those challenging conversations, we all experience occasionally…do yourself a favor STAND UP and (even if it’s through gritted teeth!) smile. Standing up is empowering and smiling does alter the way our voice sounds. I suggest to clearly use this in context and with due consideration for the feelings of others, obviously if you are talking to someone who is distressed or upset, it is going to sound a little inconsiderate and annoying to be sounding all “happy chirpy” on the other end of the phone!
Every time we practice active smiling, we are also happily creating happy endorphins in our brain and these will act on our nervous system…making us feel even more happy.
Although initially we may well be “acting” as if we are happy, eventually and surely it will get to the point where our conscious and subconscious start to believe the messages of happiness they are being constantly subjected to and we become our own self-fulfilling prophecy.
There are other ways to stay happy. Play a piece of music that inspires and lifts moods. Wear any colors which you find uplifting. Read uplifting stories, expanding our knowledge about something we are interested in has to make us feel better. Crosswords and mind puzzles are not only calming, they have the added benefit of brain-training as well!
This incredibly simple change, the conscious decision to be a happy person, can change lives. Not only yours, of those around you.
Dean Fraser is a writer, speaker and leader in creating positive mindsets within businesses or for individuals. Author of Unlock Your Life and You: But Happy, Healthy and Successful, Dean has been speaking to leaders in local government and industry, in tandem with private consultations, for over thirty years.
Having spent his time in the corporate world, achieving unprecedented million pound results, then running his own multiple businesses, he knows precisely what makes for a successful (and often more usefully unsuccessful) mindset.
Qualified initially as a Body Language Psychologist, Dean is on the register of Associated Stress Consultants and has evolved cutting-edge mindfulness techniques which offer lasting results.
Each year Dean reaches over fifteen million people through his talks, magazine articles globally, audio and paper books and his syndicated radio show.
Dean Fraser and Alive to Thrive Ltd will donate 10% of their turnover during 2019 to Save The Children to help provide education for children around the world.